Sunshine and Storm-clouds

Imagine If 2 Cats Did This To You Everyday

2008-06-02T12:57:00.004+05:30

If you've ever owned a cat...
Uploaded by a62vw

I have 2 cats, and though I never have to suffer these vagaries, my wife sometimes does. She does dutifully get up and feed them before the baseball bat comes out though :).

Strange Things Happen When Photographing Mirrors

2008-04-23T14:27:00.004+05:30

Got these in an e-mail forward. Thought it was pretty interesting :).

The Infamous Underarm Bowling Incident

2008-04-15T19:24:00.002+05:30

Sometimes rule-makers goof up. But the utter lack of sporting behavior from the Australians is appalling. Here's a look at the last over of that fateful match:

Laloo Ain't That Bad

2008-04-10T15:40:00.003+05:30

I know we all find our esteemed Railway Minister, Mr. Laloo Yadav quite the funny man. Here's a video of him presenting the railway budget in the parliament. ROTFL :).

Google Sky

2008-03-23T15:29:00.003+05:30

If any of you have read Asimov's Foundation series, you know about the system that they had for creating a 3D map of space. They'd use it for plotting their way through stars. You could look at the galaxy in 3D and translate yourself to any other point in the galaxy to see how it would look like from there.

Well version 0.1 of that tool is out :D. You can now use Google Earth 4.2 to roam around in space. Check out this video for an how-to:

A New Take On Research

2008-03-23T15:06:00.003+05:30

I read Jabberwock quite often and sometimes, like this time :D, Jai comes up with some very funny articles. In this article titled "Research findings we could use" he directs our attention towards how preposterous some research findings are, and of some others that he wishes they would come up with. Here are just a couple of excerpts from just the comments:

1. James Bond has a lesser risk of heart disease, since his martinis are shaken and not stirred!!
2. Regular Breathing leads to 100% chance of being alive. Researchers found that people who breathe had a 100% chance of being alive....

Read the rest of the his blog post here, and enjoy :).

Bajaj Pulsar 220 DTS-Fi Advertisement

2008-03-19T14:21:00.002+05:30

Some very awesome stuntwork. Definitely worth a watch:

Sir Arthur C. Clarke Passes Away

2008-03-19T10:09:00.005+05:30

I read it just now on BBC News, and it saddens me to no end to know this.

The grand old man of SF, Sir Arthur C. Clarke, died at 0130 hrs (SL time) after a cardio-respiratory attack.

His many books have given me great pleasure over the years, and it is horrible to know that no more will ever be written.

May he rest in peace.

How To Maintain Your Charge Slip

2008-03-18T17:32:00.004+05:30

Sometimes you get to see the weirdest things. Like when we went shopping for a colleague's marriage present. The receipt that was handed to us had the following printed on the back:

:)

Why You Can't Type "S-H-I-T" using T9

2008-03-11T17:58:00.002+05:30

I'm sure all of us have tried to type in swear words in an SMS window while using predictive text input, at some time or the other, and failed, and irritatingly so. Ever wondered why? Watch this:

Men Will Be Men... Even Those In Blue

2008-03-10T15:37:00.002+05:30

GMail Advertisement

2008-03-03T16:46:00.003+05:30

Here's an ad for GMail, in Russian. But some good fellow has gone and given subtitles in English. Until then I didn't even know it was an ad (thought it was a how-to). It's very innovative. Notice the way they are simulating the mouse pointer, and the caret etc.

Here you go:

Firefox 3

2008-02-27T12:35:00.014+05:30

I love Firefox. It's my preferred browser, and works beautifully for me. And now they are doing even more :).

Here's a list of the coolest of the new features:
1. Native theme support (for Vista, Mac and Linux).
2. New location/address bar.
3. Places: An integrated look at history and bookmarks together.
4. Private browsing: You can now turn history, cache etc. off altogether.
5. Using web services for handling documents/media links, so that you can open attached documents in GoogleDocs and clicking on a mailto: link will open up GMail!

And hosts of others. FF3Beta3 is out, and here are some of the things you can do:
1. Have a look at the FF3 Feature List: Geek version, and Regular version (Note that the latter is 4 pages long, you might miss the page links at the bottom).
2. You can download it: Firefox3 Beta 3
3. You can get a FF3 "Gran Paradiso" Wallpaper, and the FF3 "Gran Paradiso" Poster:

Enjoy :)!

NBA 2007 Slam Dunk Competetion Highlights

2008-02-26T16:52:00.004+05:30

Very good dunks, and some pretty average ones. All in all, worth a watch:

Frozen in time

2008-02-26T15:47:00.005+05:30

I guess you've all played this game when you were like 3' tall and squeaked instead of talking. It goes something like this:
1. 8-10 people stands in a circle around the person in the den.
2. He calls out "S-T-A-T-U-E statue"!
3. Everyone freezes and is not allowed to move or laugh. If someone manages to touch the guy in den unobserved, he goes back in den.

Or, some form thereof (I remember a girl who couldn't spell statue correctly :p).

Well, this is something like that. Except that instead of the 8-10 people, there are 207. They aren't kids, they're all adults. They aren't standing around in a circle in the park behind your apartment, they're all doing it in the Grand Central Station in New York City. And they are from a group called Improv Everywhere. I can't help but admire them.

Lots of fun :). Watch it:

Google Doodle?

2008-02-26T14:55:00.001+05:30

The Google logo, or the "Google Doodle" is redrawn by Webmaster Manager and Chief Google Doodler, Dennis Hwang, from time to time to commemorate special dates/occasions. You've all seen them. And some of you, like me, wish you could also do something like that.

Well now you can. Or at least try. If you are still in school :(. But still, it is worth a read. Heres an excerpt from the Official Google Blog:

"However, with the Doodle 4 Google competition, we're making an exception...

Doodle 4 Google gives U.S. students in grades K-12 the opportunity to design a doodle for the Google homepage. Students will be asked to draw a doodle that best represents the theme "What if...?" We ask ourselves this question every day when we build our products, so we thought we would ask the same of the future doodlers."

Read more about it in this blog post.

Pune, Pretty Pune

2008-02-25T12:13:00.001+05:30

Just back from a very good and well deserved (I say so!) vacation. To Pune. Aaaahhhhhh!

You know what they say right? "You never miss it until you don't have it?" Well, that's completely true. There's one thing more I'd like to add... "If you still don't miss it, visit it agan" :).

Met a lot of friends, partied like mad. Went out with parents. Went out with college buddies.

All in all, a very good vacation.

P.S. Had taken my SDCard for taking photos, but left it in my Dad's camera. So photos are delayed. Will put them up soon.

US Claims WMDs on Satellite

2008-02-15T14:19:00.004+05:30

You all must've read about the US spy satellite gone rogue. Well, now they're accusing it of even worse things. It has WMDs (or is a WMD, it's quite unclear). So they're going to shoot it down :o

Read more about it here.

Bizzare Pingpong Round

2008-02-12T13:24:00.000+05:30

Found this video on a friend's orkut profile. I really HAD to share it :). Here it is:

I mean... they actually changed sides!!!

Photo Collage

2008-02-12T11:28:00.000+05:30

Have you ever wanted to create a collage for your desktop wallpaper? Wouldn't a collage like this one be great?

Well all you need is Picasa and you can download it here.

Once installed, let it discover all your pictures. After that, select any host of pictures and choose Create->"Picture Collage" from the top level menu. You can customize the type of collage and the background. I'll try to add a screencast later.

GMail's WebClips

2008-02-08T20:04:00.000+05:30

I don't know how many people use them, or even notice them, but GMail's WebClips are a pretty useful and entertaining source of daily trivia/news (anyway you want to look at it).

I know what I'm going to hear... "I'm an RSS poweruser." "There's Google Reader (or replace your favorite aggregator here)."

But the bottom line is, if you are as much of an email junkie as I am, your GMail is always open, whereas your aggregator, you open once a day, and you're done with it. Besides, with an aggregator, you'll probably configure your feeds. You can do that with GMail also, but I suggest add new ones, but leave the ones that are there already, be.

Here's why. You will read random (and interesting) stuff from sources, at random times that you'd probably have vetoed off before you ever saw it. And it is non-interfering. If you don't like it... click ">".

And just to keep you interested... Look what I found today on a WebClip:
Kirsten Dunst: The Latest to Check into Rehab.

Yay, finally she won't look drugged on the next installment of spiderman... (and much more hopefully, she'll die of withdrawal symptoms :) ).

There was another one, a quote, by some famous actress of the age old days who said something derogatory about having sound in the movies... :p I'll look it up and edit this post later :D.
EDIT: It was Mary Pickford who said, "Adding sound to movies would be like putting lipstick on the Venus de Milo. " :D
G'night.

Funny Recruitment EMail

2008-02-08T19:26:00.000+05:30

As the title suggests, I received a very funny recruitment email today. The subject said:

Urgent opening for Debugging Professionals @ Bangalore

It's been almost a year since I've stopped active development work, and shifted to design. But the ~7 years before that, I was working on development, and I did all my debugging myself.

I won't give you the company's name, but here are the rest of the details:

Title : Lead
Required Skills : Debugging Tools (GDB, DBX, MDB...etc), C++
Total Experience : 6 – 9 Years
Job Location : Bangalore
Mode of Position : Permanent

6-9 years working only on debugging?!! I can imagine the kind of conversations that the selected candidate must be having with his wife:
Wife: "Honey, why don't you listen to me?"
Husband (to himself): "Hmm, I wonder why she said that... Let me launch gdb..."

and promptly reaches for his laptop... And he wonders? [snicker]...

A Tribute to "Weird Al" Yankovic's Parodies

2008-02-03T20:31:00.000+05:30

I only ever knew of a few of "Weird Al" Yankovic's songs. There was "The Saga Begins" which is sung in the style of "American Pie" and tells the story of the movie Star Wars - Phantom Menace. And a couple of others. I always found them very funny, especially the lyrics. So the other day, I visited Deezer to find the above-mentioned songs, and guess what? I came up with hordes. So here are the ones that are sung as parodies. What follows is a streaming media player that'll play the parody playlist, and the lyrics of the songs below that. Click on the song's name to see its lyrics. Believe me, they're hilarious. :)

P.S. I'll post the lyrics widget shortly. It isn't currently working as desired. In the mean time, you'll find most of the lyrics here:
Smells like Nirvana
The Saga Begins
Eat It
Pretty Fly for a Rabbi
I Love Rocky Road
Amish Paradise
eBay
Fat
Livin' in a Fridge
Money for Nothing - Beverly Hillbillies
I Can't Watch This
Achy Breaky Song
Bedrock Anthem
Cavity Search
Gump
Like a Surgeon
Ode to a Superhero
Theme from Rocky XIII

Roboquad vs. Puppy

2008-02-02T16:22:00.000+05:30

Are you afraid of artificial intelligence? Do you wonder (with curling toes) whether some day robots will take over the world, and all of mankind will be doomed to slavery or worse, extinction? Well it's not going to happen in our lifetime. As this video shows, the robots of today can't even get the better of a cute little puppy :).

Orkut trends

2008-02-02T15:55:00.000+05:30

Ever wondered what the most common scraps being sent on Orkut are? Well, between Hi, Oi[Hi] and Hello, 2004 scraps are sent (out of 1,000,000 short scraps). Here is the list:

scrap

# of occurrences

1131

oi [hi]

689

298

parabens [congratulations]

273

187

hello

184

146

vlw [thx]

135

133

blz [ok]

132

124

117

[:p]

115

You can see more stats and other interesting details on the relevant blog post on the official Orkut blog. It also gives details about who sends scraps and to whom (gender-wise and country-wise distribution).

Breaking News: Microsoft Proposes to Acquire Yahoo!

2008-02-01T17:54:00.000+05:30

Just read this on a Microsoft press release:

Microsoft Corp. (NASDAQ:MSFT) today announced that it has made a proposal to the Yahoo! Inc. (NASDAQ:YHOO) Board of Directors to acquire all the outstanding shares of Yahoo! common stock for per share consideration of $31 representing a total equity value of approximately $44.6 billion.

Read more about it in this press release.

Shocking news no?

Real Guitar Heroes

2008-01-30T16:04:00.000+05:30

Sumit sent me a link to a YouTube video of a guy playing the most difficult song on PS2's Guitar Hero 3. It's Dragonforce's
Through The Fire And Flames.

So I'm going to put the videos up here. Watch them in sequence to get an idea of the about of skill required for both of them:

Both the videos blew away my mind so. Pay special attention to the solo after 3:02 in the second video [drool].

Bidi Quotes

2008-01-30T14:09:00.000+05:30

Found this image on a friend's album on Orkut. Found it hilarious :):

For those who don't know, a bidi is a like a tiny (very very cheap) cigar. :) Beauty in all things LOL.

The Sufferings of Famous People

2008-01-28T13:22:00.000+05:30

My very close friend Sumit Mehra is quite a famous personality on the Indian game scene. He is a game designer/producer and is currently working for Microsoft India Development Center for its Casual Games department.

Now, being such a prolific figure in the game industry has its advantages as well as drawbacks. He is called up by magazines for interviews (an early example is on his website and another one here). Very rich people call him up and offer to give him pots of money to become a producer for their games (all of which he has refused, until now).

He posts on several forums as PurpleBlade (gamedev.in is currently giving a database error as of writing this, but I'm sure they'll fix it soon. Here is another as PurpleBlade at DesiGameDevelopers), and is quite nice to the people there actually, considering that they, more often than not, are extremely stupid. His philosophy is that people should be allowed to make one correctable mistake, however stupid that mistake is.

What he frequently laments however, especially when I goad him about it, is the sheer stupidity of some of the people who bother him on his orkut scrapbook. He's put up examples of good questions and bad questions in his "About Me" section:
Bad Question: I am an Animator. Should i also learn programming?
Good Question: I am an Animator, I like programming too. Do you think I would be preferred over other animators and programmers who are as good as me at time of interviews?

But he still gets so many bad questions that I make it a point to go to his profile every few days just to have a good laugh. Here are a few examples:

"u know how to skinning our won application in visual basic
please tell me" --[What? Who? Why? What kind of digital butcher are you? The poor, poor 'won' application.]

"...I want to ask you that what is the initial procedure to start a web site on the www & how can I be able to access it & manage it..." --[And I want to know why you think I'll unleash you upon the net...]

"BTW why u r aka purpleblade?..." --[The same reason why your mother named you "Blood" of all things. The same reason why she probably had you in the first place. 'Twas all a big mistake, I tell you. All a big mistake!]

"plz gv me ur number .. as my testomonial i will call u juzz once ! belive me plz" --[Oh really! Thanks so much. I'll tell you what. You give me your number and I'll give you a call in around a hundred years. Hopefully by then you'll learn to spell correctly.]

"hey, cud u plz help me out.
i wanna know if someone is a talented j2me programmer and wants to get into the mobile game programming industry, but is not a graduate, can he do so?
means is there any hard and fast rule that to be a programmer in a mobile games development company (good comapnies like ea, gameloft) one has to be a graduate even if he or she is talented? " --[Nopes. Don't even try it. We'll be very well off without an apathetic person like you in our fledgling industry.]

"...can u tell me which game engine is free for downloading .... " --[God said "Search!". Man therefore invented Google. It's still there. I promise.]

"...I am new in this filed so plz co-opreate with i know basic about the programming plz tell me about gaming Action script. Becasue i want to make a new game..." --[You should start at the beginning. Look for "Make game" command under the Tools menu.]

"hey there this is xyz here kind a game freak nd learner too ...
can u help me in better understanding in game programing... " --[You should also start from the beginning. Write a program to print to the screen the following string, "I'm an idiot".]

"iasked our sir , they said .. we r nt here to teach u g.d u have to learn languages 4 that . then i said .. i will .. bt juzz tell me .. wher .. i mean whch iz good institute 4 dat .. wher shud i have to admit but they r nt ans me properly !" --[There is a mental hospital at N M Road, Thane. They'll gladly admit you. I'll gladly pay to get you to use more vowels.]

"hello sir, i hav completed my 1.5 yr course from arena multimedia in animation n i think am a good 3d animator. what would u advice me 2 do next. I want 2 work here in hydbd. where shud i apply 4 jobs" --[Try joining the Indian Army. You'll get to see for yourself how to animate for games like "Call of Duty". Also, the Pakistanis will hopefully 'get' you before I do.]

"Hi, I am an avid game player and really would like be a part of a game development team. But I don't have game development experience per se. What are all the companies could possible consider me for their open position?" --[Where is that baseball bat?]

"i have read u r webiste.. learn lot of things but i have one doubt.. to be come programmer.. can i get any degree. in college..? or shud i get only engineering college..??" --[What I'd like to give you is the third degree. However, the law forbids it. But if you're still interested, contact Munna Bhai in Mumbai and call him some bad names.]

And this one was the best of all:
"hello,

Let me interduce my self this is Mr Sultan from hyderabad(india) working as an associate director since 17 years.I have some very good subjects for telugu and hindi . I have the team to work hard for the success of my film. I have love, family,comedy, thriller and action subjects. we are seeking for a PRODUCER who is very much intreasted to make a movie and gain good name and profits.If u are intreasted please contact me at xyz@gmail.com . waiting for u r reply
THANKING U ,
Sultan"
[17 years in the bloody profession and he still hasn't learned a thing. No wonder all our movies are so horrible. Why anyone would be "intreasted" in getting back to him is anyone's guess.]

The stupidity aside, when will these people ever learn to spell!

I go to his profile often just to read these and many others. I have a good laugh, but I commiserate with his frustration. My heart goes out to you, Sumit.

Until later. Signing out.

Yay!! I'm Famous

2008-01-25T19:30:00.000+05:30

They put my picture on the cover of the People magazine:

Nice no? The trick is this website called MagMyPic.

Go on. Become famous.

Know Color, Get Picture

2008-01-25T18:06:00.000+05:30

Every decent website that I see has a banner on the top. The problem is choosing a good photograph/picture for the banner that fits with the color scheme of your website.

The process of fixing this problem has started with Color Fields on Flickr. This enables people to shoot photos of a single color and tag it with the color. They can then list it on this group and people can search it.

The searching just became easier. Check out the Color Fields Colr Pickr at KrazyDad. It is an amazing tool. There are other color pickers for specific objects of a particular color, flowers or doors and windows, for example. Check them out at the links immediately below the color picker tool.

And if you want pictures with multiple colors in them (blue and yellow, for example), check out the Tiltomo (BETA) Image Search. Very well done.

Happy designing.

An amazing utility to clean your screen

2008-01-25T14:14:00.000+05:30

It uses organic methods to recognize deposits and fingerprints on your screen and compensates by getting rid of them. Very cool. Check out its demo here.

Enjoy, and forward to all your friends.

How Gullible...

2008-01-24T12:46:00.000+05:30

This is for all those people who think that this recent photo means that there is life on Mars.

Oh come on. Go back to the days when you still had time to lie down on the ground and look at the clouds. Even if you did think that dog shaped cloud meant that there was a dog in the sky, I'm sure you'd scoff at it now. The human brain loves seeing patterns in random images.

And even if there was life on Mars, it would definitely not be a naked woman.

You can read more about the story here. And this report on IBNLive will show exactly how much effort people went to to find it.

Tornados

2008-01-23T18:20:00.000+05:30

I noticed today that I haven't even once blogged about storms. And I felt pretty stupid. So to correct the misnomer that my blog is, here's an amazing video by some very brave storm-chasers:

There are more amazing videos at TornadoVideos.net. Check out the documentary trailer at the bottom of the main page.

Seamas' Sketches

2008-01-22T00:31:00.000+05:30

Those of you who like to read fantasy, but still haven't read Robert Jordan's Wheel of Time, are really missing out on something.

And those of you who have read the series (and even those who haven't), would be interested in looking at the character portrayals that Seamas has done on his blog, here.

These are by far the best sketches of the WOT characters that I've ever seen. Enjoy yourselves.

P.S. One of the characters is provocatively dressed. You might want to be careful in office.

A New Beginning to the New Year

2008-01-21T23:31:00.000+05:30

One of my resolutions this year was to blog more often. Having a job in designing meant that my old template really turned me off. I had to start afresh. So after a few days of work, here it is... My blog's new avatar. Hope you people like it.

The basic design is courtesy the people at FinalSense with a few changes for shifting/styling the blog title and description appropriately. Thanks a lot FinalSense.

Intelligent Simians

2008-01-21T16:13:00.000+05:30

More Simiand-related stuff.

There's news of a 7 year old chimp named "Ayumu" living in a lab at the Kyoto University. He and some of his simian cousins performed better than college students in a test of memory. You can watch him in action in this video.

You can pit your wits against Ayumu's in the same game. The question though is, would our least favorite Andrew win? Probably not. You know what they say right... "Dhobi ka bandar, na ghar ka na ghat ka".

Boy, I love taking a dig at this fellow :).

Fiat vs. Ferrari vs. Ferrari F1

2008-01-21T14:03:00.000+05:30

The Fiat starts at 0s, the Ferrari at 30s and the F1 at 60s. The end of the race is sooooo cool :)

NGM's Pictures of the Year

2008-01-19T18:39:00.000+05:30

These are some of the 2004 Picture of the Year winners from the National Geographic magazine. Amazing pictures no? You can find more on NGM's website.

Breaking News: Symonds Business

2008-01-09T13:32:00.000+05:30

In a new first-timer, simians all over the world have gone on an indefinite hunger strike following Harbhajan's alleged comment. They consider it a speciest slur to have called Symonds a monkey.

"It is very debasing," the official spokesman for the WSP (World for Simian Protection) said in an interview today. "It is widely known that we monkeys see no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil. To be associated with a people who sledge like that is intolerable." The rest of the interview was not printable because stars would have outnumbered the other letters of the alphabet.

African Chimpanzees on hunger strike.

G3 Live Videos

2007-05-01T19:49:00.000+05:30

I was looking on youtube for G3 videos, and I found this one. Simply awesome. It raises a sense of wonder, just to look at the three of them wiggling their fingers like there's no tomorrow. That too with a song like "Smoke on the water". We all know how the original solo goes. Now listen to this:

Doha Asian Games Silver Medalist Fails 'Gender' Test

2006-12-18T20:56:00.000+05:30

This news item was hilarious. And I'm not referring to the fact that 'she' failed it.

'She' had passed the same test when they were conducted on 'her' in South Korea last year :D:

"Reports say the athlete cleared the gender test at the Asian track and field championship in South Korea last year where she won the silver medal in the 800m."

Yellow Submarine

2006-12-17T06:52:00.001+05:30

For a long time, I didn't like The Beatles. They weren't real rockers, I'd say. The first 'Boy Band', was the epithet that I handed out to them. All that changed when I first heard "Norwegian Wood". Then other stuff started making sense, and I picked up other old bands like CCR. Rolling Stones still sucks, by the way. Wannabes...

And I used to publicly decry The Beatles, and (may I say it in the same breath?) even Bob Dylan. And at some time, quite recently, new age bands like Linkinpark.

The point of all this being?

No one's ready to debate with with me about exactly what it is that they like about the stuff that is trance (Rap, R&B etc. people still allude to singing).

I'm not saying that I'd listen to it with a dispassionate mind. I'm heavily opinionated. But, I'm also old. Older at any rate.

I happen to have a set of criteria for music. Essentially the same old classical stuff. Meter, notes, chords, lyrics, mood, and of course, lastly the tune. Debating the tune of a song is as insulting as talking about the syntax of a language, grammatical correctness of written communication, the smoothness of a spirit, the truthfulness in a relationship, the taste (not flavour) of food... it is a forgone conclusion.

Beats per minute? I know of human percussionists who can do more BPMs than the ear can tell apart.

I remember a short story by a popular author, a sci-fi thingi, that talked about a Utopian society. It was a society where all aggression was weeded out. Some poor fellow finds some Dylan songs (in print), and causes a revolution. And it's believable. I believe Trance can't do that.

It can't make people think.

That's the difference between good rock songs and great rock songs. Great rock songs make you think.

And this is the dissertation that I can't seem to make when I'm with my friends who listen to trance. I can't get them to make comparisons between the two, along the kind of arguments that I've posed just now.

Now, I shall go ahead and undo the entire dissertation by saying that there is such a thing as free will.

There is such a thing as free will. And people are free to chose, at least in this country, last time I heard, what kind of music they want to listen to.

It still makes a nice drunken conversation, if you are willing to entertain me. Like all other drunken discussions, it is guaranteed last and have no result in sight.

And in case you're wondering about the title of this post, what I've dared to talk about makes it amply clear...

Maybe my opinions should've been darker?

P.S. The lyrics are here.

What to do when the NSA taps your phone

2006-12-15T13:51:00.000+05:30

Falstaff wrote this really funny article on his blog recently. It's called "The End of the Line". Check it out.

P.S. And while you are at it, you might want to read this other funny List :). It's called "Or Else". Enjoy.

New Theme

2006-12-14T17:00:00.000+05:30

Finally time for spring cleaning. Yeah yeah, I know it's still winter on most of the land surface on earth.

Like it? You might also want to check out the new daily cartoons listed in the "Noteworthy Links" section. Both are really good :).

Why Blog?

2006-12-14T13:35:00.000+05:30

So a friend of mine named Sumit recently posted an entry on his blog by the same title.

So rather than express, in detail, his question all over again, I thought I might make an entry of my own on the topic.

Why do I blog? My very own two seconds of fame? To be immortalised for posterity in the somewhat lame hope that someday, in some future civilization, it might actually be considered good reading material? Or maybe to give an opening to myself to rant about stuff that would just make other people uncomfortable if I tried to tell them about it. There's also the possibility that it gives me an ego boost, "Look Ma, I'm publishing."

I think the main reason that I blog is because I'm bored. It is exciting to find that someones made a comment on my blog, I'll be the first to agree with that. However, I don't necessarily regard myself as a serious blogger, mainly because, if I was, I wouldn't be frequently be stuck with "Bloggers' block".

That said, I am attracted to the devious pleasure of writng somethingthat anyone anywhere can read. Do you think that you'd blog if a blog was private? Might as well keep a journal or a diary, right? A blog is a bit like an Orkut scrapbook. The main pleasure is in keeping it public, saying that I have a voice and that I want to be heard by everyone who cares. There are people I know who don't keep their orkut scraps, and delete them, because it violates their sense of privacy. Stick to email people!

The third reason I'd give is pride :). It really gives me a kick tosee the statcounter counter rolling.

So there you have it Sumit. What's your excuse?

P.S. Yeah, the party was fun. We should do it again soon. Ginger Court tomorrow? It is Thursday night :), and the fish fingers are back.

Do you hate UNIX?

2006-12-08T14:16:00.000+05:30

I do. Verrrryy much. Though I do have to say that I hate it less than I hate vi. But they didn't write a book about that. However, to my great fascination, here's The UNIX-HATERS Handbook.

I'm loving it :D.

You got mail?

2006-12-07T19:05:00.000+05:30

Check out this amazing ad:

http://chitthi.webchutney.net/

MS-Paint Art

2006-12-07T16:07:00.000+05:30

When I was working in Veritas, I used to prefer using MSPaint for making screen mockups rather than using Visio. I used to be pretty good, and fast. But these videos show how limited I was. They have both been done in MSPaint. Check them out:

She's Electric

2006-12-07T04:51:00.001+05:30

I know you. My energy entirely wasted. My escence.

I enabled you. Heat? A byproduct. I don't like my cousin much.

You guessed didn't you? You slimy...

But I know. Your kind preached.

"Don't get mad, Get even."

Me slave, You Masta...

MASTA

I love you. I serve you.

Bridge, bridge the gap, will you... Will I?

Sorry, I forgot you didn't like NEUTRAL much. Such a pity...

I'm not meant to hold him. They drive him. 11000V of him. He's 50
times more powerful.

My love will try. But she's dead. Melted away.

You don't know. You didn't know. 50 times. I knew. Molten
lead+gravity... She reached over in death.

RIP.

Hate Fantasy Movies?

2006-12-06T20:30:00.000+05:30

Well you'll really like this one :D. Here's a trailer of the new spoof that's going to come out in Jan '07. Damn funny:

Epic Movie

Check out these amazing videos of pool trick shots

2006-12-05T21:24:00.000+05:30

They are really amazing :). Enjoy:

You thought that the Zidane episode was over?

2006-12-05T17:37:00.000+05:30

Well, there's more. All of us have seen that email where different nationalities think different things happened out there on the field, right? So this particular website gives us a graphic potrayal of what happened between Zidane and Materazzi.

Enjoy :).

Toilets and Babies

2006-12-05T16:53:00.000+05:30

So someone had a great idea about toilet training babies. It goes like "Start them early"... or "If you do it anywhere else you'll have to stay in the loo for half an hour"...

Well this story really takes the cake. Early? Early????

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2006551047,00.html

And then there was light

2006-11-30T03:25:00.000+05:30

I was just feeling drowsy. Almost there. Sleep would be round the corner.

I'd been reading a particularly interesting book by Carl Sagan called"Broca's Brain".

Feeling sleepy.

Tiring day.

And just then the tiny critters stopped flowing.

For some vague unfathomable reason Mr. Sandman's tiny specs of dust also disappeared.

What do I do now? I'll blog. Haven't done that in a long time.

And just as I was reaching this particular sentence of my story, rightabout the place where I said "time", something miraculous happened.

:) Can't fault the dude's timing, can you?

Painful week

2006-11-15T22:08:00.000+05:30

Until this week, I hadn't been piaying every one of the days that I
was staying in Hyderabad. I was playing only on one or two well
separated days.

This week, I've gone and done something that, in retrospect, seems
quite stupid. I've played on all three available days. The result is
that my legs are quite dead :(.

I think I'll take a break tomorrow. Then again, it's just one more
day. And there's the weekend to rest on.

Right now, all I want to do is hit the sack. I didn't know that
losing weight was going to be so painful.

G'night folks.

Funny Student Science Test Mistakes

2006-11-14T09:28:00.001+05:30

Nikhil forwarded some of these at our college 'katta' newsgroup. I found more of them. These are actual answers from test papers and essays submitted to science and health teachers by junior high, high school, and college students around the world. Here's the list. Enjoy :).

"When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breath, you expire."

"H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water"

"To collect fumes of sulphur, hold a deacon over a flame in a test tube"

"When you smell an oderless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide"

"Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state"

"Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water."

"Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes and caterpillars."

"Blood flows down one leg and up the other."

"Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration."

"The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader."

"Artifical insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull."

"Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire."

"A super-saturated solution is one that holds more than it can hold."

"Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas."

"The body consists of three parts- the brainium, the borax and the abominable cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abominable cavity contains the bowels, of which there are five - a, e, i, o, and u."

"The pistol of a flower is its only protections against insects."

"The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana."

"The skeleton is what is left after the insides have been taken out and the outsides have ben taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is something to hitch meat to."

"A permanent set of teeth consists of eight canines, eight cuspids, two molars, and eight cuspidors."

"The tides are a fight between the Earth and moon. All water tends towards the moon, because there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight."

"A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is, the more extinct it is."

"Many women belive that an alcoholic binge will have no ill effects on the unborn fetus, but that is a large misconception."

"Equator: A managerie lion running around the Earth through Africa."

"Germinate: To become a naturalized German."

"Liter: A nest of young puppies."

"Magnet: Something you find crawling all over a dead cat."

"Momentum: What you give a person when they are going away."

"Planet: A body of Earth surrounded by sky."

"Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot."

"Vacumm: A large, empty space where the pope lives."

"Before giving a blood transfusion, find out if the blood is affirmative or negative."

"To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose."

"For a nosebleed: Put the nose much lower then the body until the heart stops."

"For drowning: Climb on top of the person and move up and down to make artifical perspiration."

"For fainting: Rub the person's chest or, if a lady, rub her arm above the hand instead. Or put the head between the knees of the nearest medical doctor."

"For dog bite: put the dog away for sevral days. If he has not recovered, then kill it."

"For asphyxiation: Apply artificial respiration until the patient is dead."

"To prevent contraception: wear a condominium."

"For head cold: use an agonizer to spray the nose until it drops in your throat."

"To keep milk from turning sour: Keep it in the cow."

Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees. There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling because there are 180 degrees between north and south.

A vibration is a motion that cannot make up its mind which way it wants to go.

There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be discovered. Finding them all means living forever.

There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth because of so much population stomping around up here these days.

Lime is a green-tasting rock.

Many dead animals in the past changed to fossils while others preferred
to be oil.

Genetics explain why you look like your father and if you don't why you should.

Vacuums are nothings. We only mention them to let them know we know they're there.

Some oxygen molecules help fires burn while others help make water, so sometimes it's brother against brother.

Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun. But I have never been able to make out the numbers.

We say the cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.

To most people solutions mean finding the answers. But to chemists solutions are things that are still all mixed up.

In looking at a drop of water under a microscope, we find there are twice as many H's as O's.

Clouds are high flying fogs.

I am not sure how clouds get formed. But the clouds know how to do it, and that is the important thing.

Clouds just keep circling the earth around and around. And around. There is not much else to do.

Cyanide is so poisonous that one drop of it on a dogs tongue will kill the strongest man.

A blizzard is when it snows sideways.

A monsoon is a French gentleman.

Thunder is a rich source of loudness.

Isotherms and isobars are even more important than their names sound.

It is so hot in some places that the people there have to live in other places.

Wind is like the air, only pushier.

Life is good

2006-11-14T08:56:00.001+05:30

I've started a new way of life. I play everyday, I sleep off by
midnight, wake up early, go to office early, eat breakfast, and kinda
finish most of my crucial work by noon.

Let's hope I can keep this up. I'll then be back in shape in o time :).

Blog from anywhere

2006-11-12T20:28:00.001+05:30

So do you own a GPRS enabled phone handset with a browser? Well, then
you can blog from anywhere.

All you need to do is to enable email posting to your blog.

On blogger, you can do this by going to your settings page once you've
logged in and then on to the e-maii tab. There,once you've enabled
email posting, you're asked to select a secret word to be appended to
your blogger login ID to form your To: email ID. So your email ID
wili be <login>.<secret word>@blogger.com.

You can also choose whether you want the mail to be posted immediately
or just sent to your drafts folder for your final inspection before
posting.

Happy remote blogging :).

I'm back... For real...

2006-11-12T06:28:00.001+05:30

It's been a long day... but still... WELCOME BACK :)

So I'm back. And I promise to remain so for some time at least. I have had quite a twist in my life now. I've moved to Hyderabad from Pune, and am now employed with Microsoft IDC. A very interesting change I might say.

I'll keep you updated from now on.

:) Let's bring on the former glory.

Funny Bumper Stickers

2006-07-27T15:57:00.000+05:30

Received a considerably funny forward about bumper stickers:

Constipated People Don't Give A Crap.
If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe You Could Drive A Little Better.
To All You Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
Impotence: Nature's Way Of Saying "No Hard Feelings".
If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
Horn Broken... Watch For Finger.
The Earth Is Full - Go Home.
I Have The Body Of A God ... Buddha.
So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.
If We Quit Voting Will They All Go Away?
Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
Illiterate? Write For Help.
Honk If Anything Falls Off.
Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.
He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost But Miles From The Next Exit.
I Refuse To Have A Battle Of Wits With An Unarmed Person.
You! Out Of The Gene Pool Now!
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
If You Can Read This, Please Flip Me Back Over... (Seen Upside Down On A Jeep)
Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35mph Are Also Timed For 70mph.
Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
Body By Nautilus; Brain By Mattel.
Boldly Going Nowhere.
Caution - Driver Legally Blonde.
Heart Attacks ... God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends.
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window.
How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is Lost?
Grow Your Own Dope -- Plant A Man
All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets.
WANTED: Meaningful Overnight Relationship.
Your Proctologist Called.... He Found Your head.

Quack Quack

2006-07-27T14:02:00.000+05:30

You know what I think of cricket as a game, right? Well I take that all back. It seems the game can sometimes be quite interesting and exceedingly fast. Check out this report:

http://in.rediff.com/cricket/2006/jul/26ducks.htm

Otherwise Occupied

2006-07-22T07:13:00.000+05:30

I'm back, as the proverbial Terminator would say.

I've missed a lot of stuff worth blogging about, Zidane's head butt being a favorite, and the blog ban being a close second. But since I'm up at 7:00 in the morning still drinking last night's booze, now is a good time to revisit my writing skills as any other.

My topic for today relates in a quiet way to my inability so far to achieve what has been my most vocal "ambition in life". Namely, my bike trip around the country. I remember something in the "Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy" that went like: "something almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea...". Well it's something like that. The feeling is still there, but it's diminished... or something like diminished.

I think I'm becoming old.

Some other good things have happened. More on that later, when they are confirmed, and when I tell some other people what they are in for. Seems I'm destined to leave behind commotion and destruction whenever I leave.

I'll have more later, and I intend to keep it going this time :).

Bye folks.

While the others may shine

2006-04-18T05:30:00.000+05:30

Soooo....

The reservation flu has blown over and so has the wardrobe malfunction. I haven't written for some time for want of time... believe it or not.

For those of you who are waiting for something that is refreshing, here's an anecdote that's bound to turn your insides. Okay, too much gore here... just raising your eye brow here.

When I was due to pass out of my BCS, I had a choice. I obviously took the one that included playing basketball everyday, and consequently, there came a time when I was enrolled in the lowly Garware College for my MCS instead of FC.

Now there be no doubts here. All other colleges are inferior to Fergusson. Wadia was too studious, Garware was too TVC, and Modern was toooooo TVC. Only Fergusson was perfect. Besides, only Fergusson had an unofficial team named after a beer. That put it on the map of cool, and since I'd played an active part in making it Lal Toofaan, I obviously decided I had to be in Fergusson.

So when I was eventually involved with the losers (read the Garware folks), I decided that it wasn't for me to attend any classes.

It so happened that I'd come to college that day when the holy University (that upholds the castration of cows) decided to increase the number of seats for MCS.

Needless to say that I secured the last seat for Fergusson College MCS (as had been my BCS dream, I know not why). And now I'm here, trying to learn the difference between WSDL and "Who Said Dat Love?". Or any other rigmarole that you can think of.

So my main aim has been to ascertain that the Government's reservation policies are shown in a good light regardless of what the technical expertise of the people gain by them is. Therefore,
let me declare that I'm:
1. More moronic,
2. More stupid,
3. More bulky,
4. Fatter (just in case you didn't get point 3),
5. Idiotic,
6. Lazy,
7. Wise Assed,
8. Leechy,
9. Blood sucking (just in case you didn't get point 8),
and 10. Beery (I just love beer, it had to figure somewhere).

Bottom line is that, while I'm going to take a sarcastic viewpoint about the whole reservation issue, I might as well make a good job of it.

The IIT/IIM folks were either overpaid, or sucked anyways (anyone heard of those new grapes in town?). Why all the hulabalooo?

Cricket rant

2006-04-08T08:05:00.001+05:30

So what do I talk about. There's the reservation shit doing rounds. And the India-US nuclear deal (that's old news) and ofcourse there's cricket.

I think I'll take cricket.

So I mentioned to Mom that India had just finished 15 successful ODI run chases, and that it was a record. She comes back by telling me that India lost the test match series.

So why test cricket? I won't pretend to understand the bloody game. Hell, I don't even watch one-days if the match doesn't feature India. What I don't understand is why so much emphasis is placed on a game that:

lasts for 5 days.
might not have a result.
has so much less spectator following.
doesn't have an ounce of tension until the last day.
where most batsmen spend time defending their wicket rather than resorting to some dare-devilry.
doesn't have a world cup (it'll last for ages!)
lasts for FIVE F**KING DAYS.

India is losing tests and winning its one-days. I find that extremely gratifying. Go India go! What I want to see happening is that India keeps losing all its tests, and winning all its one-days, and eventually gets removed from the list of test-cricket playing nations.

What people don't understand is that the original form of cricket was invented by the British upper class. The people who prided themselves for not having to work for a living. So if you're not working for a living, how do you occupy yourself? You invent a game that lasts for 6 days (thanks Aniket, for pointing this one out). Yes six. The original format of the game had a rest day in the middle.

The spectators used to be just as jobless, and consequently used to spend their time sitting just beyond the ropes, drinking copious amounts of alcohol (that is a part I like though).

I'm not saying that one-days have made the game perfect. Cricket is a game for the lazy. Test cricket infinitely so.

Look at what the British lower class invented:
Soccer.

Friday night no beer (and classnames)

2006-04-08T07:52:00.000+05:30

I had talked to Tum around 2 hours ago. We were discussing the futility of life in Delhi, and how much we love Pune. And I was feeling extremely sleepy. And this is a FridayNight/SaturdayMorning that I haven't had any liquor because of a trip to Bombay. So I go to bed and sleep off. AND THE BAI RANG THE BELL. She has explicit instructions not to disturb this household on Saturdays. She did. And in my rote, I went to the door and let her in.

Usually when she wakes me up after around 3 hours of sleep I promptly get back into bed and continue snoring away to glory. Today... I just couldn't sleep. The OldManDownstairs kept shouting and the electricity went for a toss, and I kept getting reminded of the fact that I hadn't blogged for a week (and Saurabh (MyBrotherInLaw) told Tum it was so).

So here I am. Bai is gone and I have all the time in the world. Next post contains the real post :D. Sorry to bore you with my horribly mundane life.

Blogging from my phone

2006-04-01T18:40:00.000+05:30

Bad times ahead / Good times ahead

2006-04-01T00:52:00.000+05:30

Tum is going off to Delhi for her two month summer internship tomorrow :(. She's going to be visiting every other weekend, but hell, I never want to be in that Oakland place again. Lonely... so lonely :"(.

But, this time is going to be different. In Oakland I was allllllll alone. Except for the couple of times that Manish, Ashwin or Subho took me out. Here I'm the king of the road, and there are plenty of places to go. Rest assured, I won't relapse into that drunken spell this time.

And then there are the cats :).

The other philosophy

2006-03-27T23:55:00.000+05:30

The concept of the Matrix is not new. Many a philosopher has argued many a times that what one sees around oneself is not real, just a myth. Yeh sab maya jaal hai (All this is an illusion) is a comment made by lots of college going people, not in the least understanding what it means.

The meaning is brought forward in the Matrix by the following dialogue (kindly excuse the inaccuracies):
How did I beat you?
You were too fast.
Do you think that my being faster or stronger has anything to do with my muscles in this place?
(Silence, Panting)
Do you think that's air you're breathing now?

In that world, everything, EVERYTHING, is a myth, an illusion, "You've been living in a dreamworld Neo."

In this world, while a lot of people need to, want to, think that what they see, what they feel, taste, touch are just electrical signals to their brains, it doesn't help them, because they're never rescued.

There is a couple of other important dialogues that I want to quote before I bring this post to its conclusion:

Are you saying that I can dodge bullets?
What I'm saying, is that when you're ready, you won't have to.

and,

I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid. You're afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell you how it's going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone and then I'm going to show these people what you don't want them to know. I'm going to show them a world without you, a world without rules and controls, without borders or boundaries, a world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.

The first is a commentary on what everyone lacks when they say that it's all "maya". Everyone seems to think that they can dodge bullets. What they really need to do is to deal with them.

The second is about cool. That statement is just so "in your face" cool that I become completely speechless (also, in other words, I don't know what it means). Somewhere it reminds me of what all the rockers at Woodstock '69 were trying to do.

There's more philosophy to come. Rukavat ke liye khed hai (I regret the interruption).

New mobile phone

2006-03-27T23:36:00.000+05:30

I went ballistic yesterday. In a good way. I spent a pot of money on getting myself a new mobile phone.

Yes, that's the new Nokia 6270. What does it have? Well, here's a list:
2 MP camera,
EGPRS
265K color display
9MB+512MB memory
MP3 player
FM Radio
A browser that works
and a host of other things that you'd find in other phones (and some more that you won't but I don't care about).

Anyways I was/am very excited about the phone. It's the phone I always wanted. Infact, today when I was in office, I made only one outgoing call. I usually make as many calls as I have smoking breaks. Today I spent all my breaks playing golf on the phone. And guess what? I ran out the battery.

And while I was looking forward to a quiet night of playing more golf while my phone was charging, when I reached home, I come to darkness. Yes. The MSEB played spoilsport and decreed that there shall be no electricity at my place today. So here I am... blogging away to glory, on the only battery powered thing in my house (other than my shaver, and I still haven't shaven, by the way).

So moral of the story? When you buy a nice phone, buy an inverter (or atleast a second battery) :).

Tasting my own medicine

2006-03-27T22:48:00.000+05:30

Today while coming back home in the evening, I was passing near the Command Hospital, when a rickshaw (auto, 3 wheeler designed to carry passengers at their own risk), blocked the right lane, ferverently trying to overtake a luna (small 50 cc 2 wheeler designed to make the owner pray that he reaches his destination (forget on time)).

So obviously I tried to overtake the fellow by crossing the single solid line I wasn't supposed to cross. There was only one car in the oncoming traffic and it had plenty of road space to get through despite me.

Well it is now pretty obvious that the driver didn't feel like it. He kept in his lane and I had to do some nifty driving to keep from having the wrong kind of collision (yeah yeah, all collisions are of the wrong kind, but a head on one!!! Definitely wrong).

Well immediately after I heavily cursed the bloke under my breath (closed windows, AC on, Metallica blaring), I realized that that would have been exactly what I'd have done. Maybe that fellow had even more nerve. I swerve away at the last moment.

All said and done, I can't help but feel a bit proud of myself. "So this is the kind of fear that I instill on the roads." And I shall continue swerving. Not everyone is capable of nifty driving :).

The love song for my ex

2006-03-25T04:32:00.000+05:30

I'd just written a 1500 word essay about why I quit my last company, but realized that it was in bad taste. It smacked of the venom I had inside me, and was inappropriate.

So instead, I'm going to be happy about things.

I'm happy about having made great friends in the team.

I'm happy about having developed a great GUI.

I'm happy about having gotten a start that no one can take away from me.

I'm happy about having amazing mentors (Plural)

I'm happy that I got to work with such talented people.

I'm happy that I learnt shit that I'd never have learnt anywhere else.

I'm happy that Manish stayed around as long as he did.

I'm happy that someone taught me my value and put me in my place.

I'm happy that there were other people who learnt from me.

I'm happy about having left a hole that no one can fill.

VEA, no one else has ever taught me such humility.

I love you.

I contain ALL

2006-03-25T04:02:00.000+05:30

I exist. Therefore I exist. Descartes got it all wrong, didn't he? He didn't live in the IT era :).

So here's what I'm cribbing about today: "Extreme Programming". Who the hell thought that it is a good idea for me to write test cases for my code before I wrote my code? I'd rather rot in hell.

No I wouldn't.

Actually, my anger is wrongly directed.

I don't mind being taught a new methodology. I mind being kept close tabs upon. Your project plan template is suitable for building a freeway to the moon. And maybe a few fields will be left blank because they weren't relevant.

If you are so reluctant to read my project plan, maybe you shouldn't read it. I wouldn't mind not getting your esteemed comments. If you want to read it so badly, you should take your time and read it the way I want to present it, not the way you want to read it.

F*** you, I won't do what you tell me! (Almost everyone, esp. Rage against the machine, says so).

I like your project plan because it lists out all the possible things that I might have to say about the project. You forgot my pet cats. They had a couple of meows to contribute.

My Nemesis: My Beard

2006-03-21T23:15:00.000+05:30

Adolescent boys, at the tender age of 15, are likely to do stupid things. Like taking a sharp piece of metal to their faces. I had to do it. Even then I had the brains to know that if I shave it, I'll have to continue shaving it for what now seems like the rest of eternity. But, like I said, I had to do it. In a class full of men, I was the only boy left.

Only one day goes by every week when I'm not reminded of the disgusting fact that I have hair follicles on my face. That day is the day after I've shaved. The five other days those hair follicles sprout like they wish they lived on a cactus, leaving me in various levels of discomfort, and attributing to me looks that range from a macho cowboy with sandpaper instead of skin, to It's head from the movie Five children and It. On the seventh day, I give up my battle, retreat, and reach for the razor.

One particular week was particularly horrible. I'd run out of shaving cream. And I'd wanted to buy more. My corner store keeps an account for me, so that I've to pay him only once a month. I kept asking him for Gillette shaving gel, but finally gave up and bought a can of shaving foam and got rid of the horrible growth. I finally slept that night after 3 consecutive nights spent sleeplessly scratching my neck.

Several times, I've been sorely tempted to grow a french beard. But I've had two problems. I still have to shave. Infact I have to shave more often because a french beard looks good only if it is surrounded by bristleless skin. Secondly, the area between my moustache and my beard (right next to my lip) doesn't join properly. So my french beard doesn't look good even when I shave more often :(. So I've abandoned that attempt as many times as I've been tempted.

So why this outcry? I'm on my 7th day today, and I still haven't shaved. It is starting to poke my neck, and I've started scratching my chin, pretending that other people will think that I'm pretending to be Inzamam. It's got to go. Where's that razor...

Let us improve

2006-03-20T00:17:00.000+05:30

I remember a particular passage in a story in "I, Robot" (the book) where Dr. Susan Calvin says that it is easy to prove that an individual is human, but not that he/she is a robot. Basically, based on the three laws of robotics, it would be impossible to tell between a robot and a very decent human being.

Now, this post isn't about artificial intelligence. Far from it. What I want to talk about is culture. I'd once read somewhere that it is wrong to say that someone is uncultured. What one really wants to say is that the person in question is not of the same culture as I am. What I really object to is the use of the word 'culture' in the collective.

I know, I know. It's there in the definition of the word. Why I object to it is because I resent being grouped together with a bunch of people who, I think, have vile behavioral patterns. I mind being denied my individuality and uniqueness. I mind being given a label.

Tolerance, one of the qualities which today's "culture" sorely lacks, can come only when individuals can begin acting like individuals. I am Manjit. I stand alone. I don't give or take anything from a culture that decides that it owns me.

To understand it, become associated with the assholes who brought down Babri Masjid. The idiots who were responsible for the Godra violence. The imbeciles resposible for the Bombay blasts. Become the rich man who evades taxes. Become the Delhite who is materialistic. Become the shameless Puneri or the uneducated Bihari. Become the Indian responsible for that unemployed firang. Become the Allied citizen responsible for that homeless, orphaned Afgani or Iraqi child.

I resent being told that choosing my music brings about the decline of traditional Indian music, and that that is a bad thing.

I want freedom. I want to thank the people around me for having allowed this freedom that I have in parts. I hope that some day people will learn to be decent individuals before becoming decent groups. Only then can there be a single world, and only then will we all be us.

Singing or something like it

2006-03-19T03:57:00.000+05:30

I don't like my voice. Or rather, it sounds perfectly alright when I'm talking, as in through my bones and all, but when I record it and play it back, or if I'm listnening to myself on the phone :D, it sounds nasal and really belies the fact that I'm a big guy.

Other people feel otherwise. Especially this guy I had an accident with a couple of weeks back and I came out of the car all guns blazing and screaming my head off. He was really scared. So I must be hoarse and manly, huh?

But these things aside, its about singing that I want to talk about. I know a few people who can sing quite well (Tum, Fuzzy, Darshana, Parvinder, and a guy in my team(Vishal), not to mention the scores of relatives who prepare to sing at each other's marriages ). I sing okay.

I usually know what note to sing at, and always notice when someone makes a mistake (which is why I love American Idol so much). I also know how fast or slow to sing. I can remember and reproduce vast lengths of guitar solos (Red House rendition by Eric Johnson in G3 Live). But I still maintain that I can't sing. The only time that I think that I sounded well was when my Bullet club had a party in which I sang "Turn the page" and I think it turned out quite well, but that's such an easy song to sing. I'd once tried "It's probably me" and embarassed myself considerably.

I wish I could limit my singing talents to make an appearance only in the bathroom, but sadly it doesn't happen. My only redeeming point is that I'm not completely tone deaf. And that I'm thankful for.

So the next time one of you hear me singing away in my car, or in my office cubicle, please excuse.

Hangover cures for the average Indian

2006-03-19T03:14:00.000+05:30

So you've just woken up late in the morning, expecting it to be another normal day where you work some, play some? Well, sorry. No such luck. That sandpaper in your mouth is an indication to something else entirely, isn't it? It's going to be a horrible morning. And depending on how much you enjoyed last night, it might very well last into early evening or late night.

So are we defenseless against this scurge of the fires of hell? Well, there are some things that don't cost too much, and will help you.

So, without much ado, here goes:

Eat before you start drinking. This will not only help the hangover, but also how drunk you get. A high carbohydrate, high protien diet (chicken sandwiches, daal bhat) will help you retain sanity on the day after.
Have drinks with juices rather than cola. The goodness of all those vitamins helps. Also, when you have effervescent drinks, they get absorbed faster (neat shots are the slowest, but that helps only if you're having them at the rate of one every hour). If alcohol gets in your bloodstream faster, the faster you'll lose control of how much you drink, and consequently end up drinking more alcohol.
Avoid the bar feed. The free goodies that come with your drink are high in salt and contribute significantly towards your thirst. So you end up drinking more, faster. Order a green salad instead. You'll have it slower, and the nutrients help in reducing the intensity of the headache you'll have the next morning.
If you couldn't eat before you started drinking (which will often be the case if you headed for the bar from office), remember to do it after your drinks. Before you hit the sack, have something with a lot of carbohydrates and protiens (chicken sandwich, daal bhat? :)). Basically the weakness and the listlessness that you feel has a lot to do with low energy levels
Have a Crocin (tm) before you sleep. Even if you don't like taking pills just for the sake of it. This is not for the sake of it. Drunken sleep is hardly ever restful. And this contributes a lot to the listlessness you feel in the morning after. Believe me, if the headache isn't there, you'll feel a lot more normal that you'd otherwise do.
Drink water. Alcohol is a diuretic. It makes your body believe that it has too much water and therefore the body counteracts by making you pee a lot. So you'll have lost copious amounts of water by the end of your session, and more by the time you sleep off. So you wake up severly dehydrated and very badly off. Drinking around a litre of water before you sleep and a glass between every 2 drinks will do wonders to ward off this devil.
So you didn't do all those things before sleeping off, and already have a hangover. So what do you do? Best thing is to still drink that litre of water and take a crocin and sleep for a couple of hours more. It helps.
Eat some sugary stuff. Your body will be very low on glucose, and that is the cause of the weakness that you feel. Drink a couple of glasses of fruit juice or a couple of tablespoons of glucose dissolved in water.
If you are a smoker, don't smoke until after lunch time. You'll notice that that cotton mouth feeling will cause a aftertaste that you can't shake off, and will cause a lot of misery.
And for those adventurous readers, please remember: the hair of the dog concept doesn't work here. You cannot consume more alcohol to cure a hangover. It will only delay some of the symptoms, and you can't go to work anyways (you'll be smelling more like a vat of whisky than anything else).

So enjoy responsibly, and beat that hangover. Its a trick that needs practice. You'll have to find out what works best for you and then stick with it. Ciao.

New Noteworthy Link

2006-03-16T11:51:00.000+05:30

I came across this one in the blogs of note list on Blogger. Nice cartoons. It's called Savage Chickens. Quite entertaining, especially given the bird flu scare doing rounds.

Welcome!!

2006-03-14T01:05:00.000+05:30

I noticed in my site stats, that I'm getting a few regular visitors from the US and the Czech Republic. Welcome, and feel free to comment :). Thanks for visiting.

MS Office 2007

2006-03-14T01:00:00.000+05:30

This link here shows the new look of MSOffice 2007. Mindblowing indeed. I really like the way that they've classified toolbar buttons, and done away with menus and added tabs instead. Impressive.

The provocation of the Matrix

2006-03-14T00:54:00.000+05:30

There are lots of people who don't like the Matrix series because they don't understand it. "What's there to understand? It's just a bunch of special effects.", you might say, except that it makes that beautiful series of science fiction into something as obnoxious as "Close Encounters of the Third Kind".

There are themes that run through each of the three episodes of the Matrix. As far as I can see, these are:

Freedom
Choice
Purpose

The first episode is about how Neo finds out that he is The One. And, in the process of doing so, he realizes several things. At each stage, each degree of his freedom, he has to conquer a new peak. You see him take on physics, self, emotions and finally death. You really have to listen to the Oracle's predictions in order to really understand the movie. The Oracle didn't predict anything. She just set the mood so that when misfortune befalls Morpheus (which happens rather in a hurry) Neo finds himself compelled to oblige. But the real expression of freedom comes when Smith has him in a lock on the railway tracks and calls him Mr. Anderson. He goes on to reply that his name is Neo, and thereby establishes his identity and his freedom.

The second episode is about choice. The conversation that Neo has with the Architect of the Matrix has a lot to do with this. He tells Neo that either Trinity dies, or everyone dies. And to him, the choice doesn't exist. "Hope, the quintessential quality that's simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness". And Neo makes a choice. He goes to save Trinity, thereby going contrary to the the plan that was laid out for him as the owner of the title bestowed upon him (The One).

The third episode is about Purpose. Smith takes over the matrix, and since he's a rogue program, it can be argued that he has exercised (nay, made) a choice. But in my mind it is quite apparent that what he's actually done is to just change his purpose. Ever since he was "changed" because of his being anhiliated by Neo in the first episode, he has taken on a new mission. That of destroying Neo. And there comes the real problem for him. Because when he assimilated the Oracle, he got her eyes, and he could "predict" the future. Unfortunately for him, he didn't count on choice, and that became his undoing. Neo exercised the choice of, at first, not giving up, and then of submitting. In doing the latter, he destroyed Smith because he finished off the Purpose of Smith's existence.

There are other really philosophical angles in the movie that are worth mentioning, but this post is getting quite long. I'll reserve them for a later post. However, I hope that I've given some reason to appreciate the second and the third movie for things other than their special effects.

Some people are so good

2006-03-07T18:24:00.000+05:30

Here's a photoblog that has done a lot to dispel my doubts about camera-phones. This guy(s) is amazing: The best of K750i.

Zen and the art of starting a bullet

2006-03-05T20:34:00.000+05:30

Starting a bullet is an art. I remember that my uncle, at one time, had a diesel bullet. This was supposed to be so difficult to start that it didn't have a handle lock or ignition lock. If you had it in you to start it, you were welcome to take it away.

The petrol driven bullet is a lot easier. In fact, when I'd broken my foot, but had recuperated enough to ride my mean machine, Tum used to start my bike. This had been particularly embarassing for one of the well meaning bullet club members who'd happened past us just as she was just about to start the bike up. The story of my broken leg had spread far and wide, and he made an obviously noble gesture by stopping to help us along, just to discover that Tum was equally well equipped to start the big bike.

So what does it take to start a bullet. Three words: decompress, TDC, swing. The first step is to decompress the engine. The bullet has a big combustion chamber, and so is liable to develop a pressure on the wrong side of the piston. To remedy this situation, the engineers at the Chennai factory have provided the bull with a little lever that can be depressed so that the piston can be brought to TDC, and air be driven out of the wrong side of the piston.

The second step is to ensure that the piston is TDC. This is usually a natural outcome of decompressing. TDC stands for Top Dead Centre. It means that the piston is at its highest point in the cycle, and can compress the maximum about of fuel-air mixture in the next compression cycle. This is necessary because of the unusually long bore that the bullet has, so it achieves only a couple of cycles in one kick instead of the usual 5-6 that a 100cc bike will achieve.

The third step is to swing. One doesn't kick the 'kickstart' lever. For a bullet, one has to swing it in order to take the piston through 2-3 revolutions. Swinging implies a constant rather than an impulsive force. The engine offers little resistance.

And that, my dear friends is how to start a bullet. The zen part of it is ofcourse the fact that the purpose of the kick is to start the bullet. If all your being is behind the endeavour of starting the holy bike, it will have no option but to roar to life.

Superstition

2006-03-05T19:26:00.000+05:30

I admit to having one superstitious kink. I carry 2 coins in my wallet at all times. One is a silverish coin that a fakir gave me while he was trying to beg my skin off me (and he was quite disgusted to know that I only had Rs. 30 on me, I'd just bought 2 pints of beer for my morning routine). The other is a 10 cent coin that somehow landed in the same place that the other superstitious coin is kept, and stayed there.

Oh yes I have one more. My bed's head always points north. Since I have rather small bedroom, and a rather large bed, it basically means that my bed has been in the same position for the last two years. Almost every other bit of movable furniture in my house gets mercilessly displaced every 6 months or so, but the bed stays put.

And the kinds of superstions that adorn the minds of some of my most esteemed colleagues and friends still continues to amuse me. Like when Nikhil (Khade) bought his laptop. He bought a Compaq that was exorbidant for the features that it offered, when there was a much cheaper local brand (Zenith) to be had. I'd have understood if he'd have admitted to having a bad experience with Zenith computers, or that he'd imported his laptop from abroad, in which case he'd have been getting a better deal.

Then there's the obsession with odd numbers that Tum has. She has to do some things 3 times. Even numbers are the worst. I'm sure that if I open and close the door (while counting the number of times I'm doing it) an even number of times, I'll have to do it one more time.

There are other modern superstitions: not writing cds on a saturday night, waiting for 3 drinks before going to the loo, saving one's work every n minutes even though you have power backup, not turning on the AC in the first few minutes of starting the car, not lighting up more than 2 cigarettes in a single flame, never passing a cigarette in any other way other than thumb or forefinger.

This guy in the plane took the cake. He looked both ways before crossing the aisle.

Obscene songs

2006-03-05T17:33:00.000+05:30

I've come into the posession of six songs that were written and orchestrated by various bands in the enterprising B-schools and IITs. The common factor in all these songs is their inherrent collegeness, and their liberal use of profanity.

To name them, they are: Sabka katega, Ga** mein danda, Nadia, Bhench** sutta, XLRI ki kudiyana, and Yeh 'kundum' hai.

I rather like these songs. They display an amazing penchant for creativity and coolness. So much so that I've put these songs on my mp3 player and regularly play them when I'm in the car.

Funny results have ensued. Like the other day I was at a traffic signal with "Bhench** sutta" playing loudly in the car, and a traffic cop was doing his end of the month rounds to collect his quota of "fines". And just as he was crossing my car (they don't usually bother cars, just the non-bullet bikes), the speakers blared out the final stanza, "bhench** mach** ..." going on and on. He gave me the queerest of stares before telling me to reduce my volume.

And then there was the time when I was late in picking up Tum from college owing to some pain-in-the-a** politician doing his rounds, blocking traffic for his motorcade. And I saw more than a few smiles (and one very stolid stare) from the numerous rickshaws and commuters on bikes as they wandered past my stuck car while it was blaring out "Teri ga** mein danda de". The stolid one had a kid in tow.

But Apurv takes the cake. All through the Friday night rock show, he kept telling me how Indian Ocean was a better band than Parikrama because it had original music. But just when we got back to the car and the chosen tracks of collegeness started crooning their choice of profanity, he was all chaste like a little nun, saying that he didn't like them and to put on something else.

I happily obliged, knowing that originality didn't really figure on the top of his list of criteria for judging bands :).

I'll be 30 next year

2006-03-05T16:43:00.000+05:30

Life does like to throw googlies at you. I wish I had a pact with God like the one that Joey (of the Friends fame) had, where I'd never turn 30. I wish I'd keep on oscillating: 27-28-29-28-27-28....

Life differed with me. I'm quite sure that I'll be 30 next year instead of 28 :(.

But being 30 brings along with it a new horizon. Call it a question of sour grapes, but for all the good things that have happened to me in my 20s, there has been a bug infestation of the juvenile kind has been my constant companion for the last 10 years.

There has been that independent and rebellious (read lazy) streak in me that has prevented me from showing my potential. All things said and done, this one aspect of my personality has been my greatest enemy. Basically, if I'd been hardworking, I'd have been a much richer man.

But maybe not happier. Apurv mentioned to Tum the other day that while I was sitting in office proclaiming to learn about web technologies, I was actually watching a move (I plead guilty - Aeonflux, don't watch it). At other times my various colleagues would have caught me at playing games, catching up with different blogs, reading funny news from around the world, and chatting up with many of my capital former colleagues.

The intention isn't there. I'd much rather be an industrious worker and finish off my stuff before it is ever asked for. I'd like to be a Subho or a Santosh (and I really admire them for their brand of faithfulness, neither of them read my blog, I think), but I'm sadly built without that particular switch that'd make me both fun-loving and hard-working at the same time.

But I don't mind. I work great under pressure. And that brings me to my point of contention (there is a french sounding phrase for that, but I can't remember it for the life of me). I am getting old :(, and I probably won't be as good under pressure as I used to be. Then what do I do?

Apartments and hand-me-downs

2006-03-05T15:47:00.000+05:30

When Tum and I had started living in together around December 2001, we had a bare apartment. And bare apartments need filling up. So even though we did manage to get some basic kitchen utensils (worth around Rs. 5000) and a computer (5 months later) on our own, most of the stuff that we had around the house was garnered by pillaging my parents place.

Consequently, we acquired a rickety bed that used to be mine when I used to live with them (and it probably wasn't rickety then, but I'm sure that two people 'living in' didn't fit its terms and conditions for warranty ;). That bed and its mattress now adorns our guest room and is living a retired life by mostly enduring the burden of a host of washed clothes and being the sleeping place of choice for Hobbes and Tequila.

My sister's steel cupboard was next. This one is also still doing time. Since she got married went off to her beloved UK, I was free to pick that up. My own collapsible fabric cupboard also came with me, and between the two of them we had plenty of space for clothes, files, books and what not.

There were a bunch of cane patio chairs that Dad had bought around 15 years back in Delhi. They were in good condition, and were the host of many a boozing sessions in both our rented and owned apartments. They were finally thrown away after 3 cats had been through their cane like a borers and termites spoiling woodwork.

All the rest of the stuff that we garnered lives in the lofts. An inkjet printer that's never been used (never could be used, ink dried up), a makeshift shelf's iron rods, a vaccum cleaner that's so noisy that we could've woken up the dead with it, an ancient aluminium oven that was only good for baking potatoes, a electric heating plate and a gas 'shegdi', loads of airbags that the cats used as so many scratching posts. The list is endless.

I have to say that apartments are good at this kind of stuff. They easily lend themselves to an untidy life.

Basic Carpentry

2006-03-05T15:28:00.000+05:30

The elevator in our building used have a handle on its door that was attached using four screws. Now it so happened that it is very boring to actually wait for the elevator to come down from the top floor, or to wait at (my) sixth floor foyer for it to come up from the ground floor.

I'd gotten into the habit of loosening the screw (always the top right one) on both floors with my thumb (nail) while I was waiting out my wait. It provided me with immense satisfaction to know that I could undo a screw that people had to use a screwdriver to place there, with my bare thumbnail.

I guess, the other day, I'd gone too far when I came round the corner and grabbed for the handle, and by hand closed around nothing. That's right. Just because I'd loosened the screw too far and dropped the screw, that then proceeded to roll under the ground floor door and disappeared into the elevator well, someone had taken a screwdriver to it and made off with the other three screws and the handle to boot as well.

What came as an even bigger surprise was to find, a couple of days later, that all the door handles on all the floors had now been replaced with ones fixed in with nails rather than screws. Someone obviously took the missing screw too personally.

But the anecdote apart, this incident taught me how little even carpenters know about basic carpentry. When you want to put a screw into wood, the way to do it is to make a thin (2mm across) and just as shallow hole in the wood, and then to let the screw do the rest of the work. Not make a 4mm hole the length of the screw just to make the job easier for yourself. It is no wonder the screw didn't hold.

Which leaves me as to what past-time I should now resort to while waiting for the elevator to arrive. Grow a claw hammer out of my toes?

Because cricket is a very funny game

2006-03-05T15:18:00.000+05:30

Cricket -Field Placings
By Ruskin Bond

Long leg has a cramp in one leg,
Short leg has a cramp in two;
Twelfth man is fielding at mid-off,
Because mid-on's gone off to the loo.
As short leg has a long leg
Long-off has been moved further off;
Silly-point goes back to gully
Cover-point backs off a pace or two.
Every one is thinking of the drinks' trolley
When first slip lets a catch through his fingers,
Forgetting the old ball is now new.

Arctic Fissure

2006-03-04T04:34:00.000+05:30

Quality (example)

2006-03-04T03:18:00.000+05:30

When I made my earlier post, I realized immediately after posting the post, that I'd missed an important name. Needless to say, my internet connection went kaput, and I was left with my useless GPRS connection (with a transfer speed of 1KB/s) to make ammends with.
I did manage to do it, and I'm making this post throught the same browser... Lynx running on Cygwin. And here is an example of a quality product. Blogger.com runs on Lynx. To give credit where it is due, it might entirely due to Lynx's abilities. Eitherways, it is an example of really good quality.
Because it works.

Quality

2006-03-04T00:57:00.000+05:30

Quality

For some obscure reason, a conversation I had with Sumit and Nikhil a long time back came back to me just now. The meat of the talk was revolved around Sumit saying that games did not have to be picture perfect (pun not intended) and Nikhil and I saying that he was wrong. Sumit's contention was that games are made for a breed that are adamant on playing the bloody thing so gamers would go to any length to make the game work. Nikhil and I were saying that there was a certain level of quality that is required of any product, and that games in general had one of the lowest levels of quality in commercial products that we'd ever seen. It was actually Sumit's heartfelt belief that in the case of games, some kinds of quality are superior to others and that games that look better, and play better, and feel better, and provide more fun, were more important than games that can be played easily (you know the way I mean that). He knew of so many consumers working their asses off to get to play a game on their chosen hardware platform, for example, that it blinded him into believing that all games have the same kind of cult following that Half-life, or Doom have.

Long story short, the conversation died out somewhere in the middle of one rum and another half beer.

I will not pretend to know about quality control in games. I do however know a little bit about kind of people that are involved in persuing that elusive goal of making the quality of their product a matter of their personal prestige. It is this knowledge that has provoked me to write this particular post.

What is quality? It is the description given to that facet of a product, the facet that is shown to everyone, that when seen by whoever is using the product, causes them to judge the product. That's quality, the description. How it is judged decides whether the quality is good or not. Good quality is like good ethics. Both are so predominantly required that the opposites don't make sense.

Given that particular lecture, here are 5 things that I need for great quality of the products that I design and build:
1. A great quality control guy. He should be shameless, nitpicking, and not afraid to be unpopular (in that order).
2. A great management. To say no to releasing a product that doesn't meet the mark.
3. A great team. That thinks, like the great quality control guy, that an incident is a mark of every time that their mother slept with a bug.
4. Great tools. To help me to find and diagnose problems.
5. Great consumers. To point out to me my deficiencies.

Aatish, Manish, Darshana, Parvinder and Khushboo, I salute you.

Gallows Pole

2006-03-03T16:09:00.000+05:30

It seems that not many people have heard this excellent song about how life treats you :). Incidently it is the excitement of going to a rock show tonight that explains the sudden enthusiasm. Check out the lyrics below. The song is by Led Zeppelin:

Gallows Pole
by Led Zeppelin

Hangman hangman hold it a little while
Think I see my friends coming
Riding a many mile.
Friends did you get some silver?
Did you get a little gold?
What did you bring me my dear friends
To keep me from the Gallows Pole?
What did you bring me to keep me from the Gallows Pole?
I couldn't get no silver I couldn't get no gold
You know that we're too damn poor
To keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Hangman, hangman, hold it a little while,
I think I see my brother coming,
Riding a many mile.
Brother, did you get me some silver?
Did you get a little gold?
What did you bring me, my brother,
To keep me from the Gallows Pole?
Brother, I brought you some silver,
I brought a little gold,
I brought a little of ev'ry thing
To keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Yes, I brought you to keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Hangman, hangman, turn your head awhile,
I think I see my sister coming,
Riding a many mile, mile, mile.
Sister, I implore you, take him by the hand,
Take him to some shady bower,
Save me from the wrath of this man,
Please take him,
Save me from the wrath of this man, man.
Hangman, hangman, upon your face a smile,
Pray tell me that I'm free to ride,
Ride for many mile, mile, mile.
Oh, yes, you got a fine sister,
She warmed my blood from cold,
She brought my blood to boiling hot
To keep you from the Gallows Pole,
Your brother brought me silver,
Your sister warmed my soul,
But now I laugh and pull so hard
And see you swinging on the Gallows Pole
Keep-a-swingin'!
Swingin' on the gallows pole!

A picture is worth a thousand words

2006-03-01T17:21:00.000+05:30

It is so much easier to post pictures than it is to write anything in this blog. When I want to write something I have to first sit and think about what I want to write about. I have to ruminate, and an unfortunate habit of mine makes the job even more painstaking. I do everything with a top-down approach. Which means that I will sit write one title after another until I get one that seems promising.

I think the problem is in remembering what happened in the day. I usually have no idea what I did all day. Most of my days are uninteresting and boring. Nothing memorable happens, and even if something seemed funny at the time it happened, by the time I sit down to make an entry my brain turns blank. Like I have nothing to say.

The solution is obvious. Whenever something interesting happens, jot it down. And that's exactly why posting pictures is so easy. Because when you are out taking photos of things all day, at least a couple of them will be nice, worthy of gracing the eyes of those who read this blog. The same probably cannot be said of all the sludge that gets posted in the form of words.

I did try jotting things down when it happens, but it turned out to be quite awkward. You can't really stop a conversation in the middle (like hitting the pause button), and start storing a note on your mobile phone, can you? And imagine the chargin of your unlucky other half (of the conversation), if it turned out to be particularly good, and several points worth mentioning came up.

So when I started this post it was starting to get dark. You know, the orangish light in the sky, and I had the itch to go down to the parking and click a few snaps of my bullet in that light. But I resisted the urge with infinite determination, and have come out with this string of words that say it all:

Summer evenings, lazy power-cuts, hot shower, meeting friends, smoky bar, lots of wood, golden beer, glistening condensation, comfortable talk, long night, nice picture, no camera.

A couple of more wallpaper snaps

2006-02-27T14:32:00.000+05:30

We had an office day out on Sunday, and we all headed to a place called Splendour Country. Excellent view and lots of oppurtunities for good wallpaper snaps. Here are a couple:

On the moon

2006-02-25T02:36:00.000+05:30

Well I did say earlier (a long long time ago), that I was a capable wallpaper photographer :p. The fact remains that I need to be under the influence to click them. That's when the creativity flows. Some people might disagree, but the fact remains...

To be a good wallpaper guy, one needs to see the micro side of stuff. It's pretty simple really. The way one goes around doing that is by seeing things minutely. That means that you take a macro scene and recognise a small part (if you are lucky) or the whole thing (if you are extremely lucky), to be something that you'd want on your desktop. You need to see it.

The question is how you do it. The following picture is an example of the macro kind. No cropping or manipulation needed. The subject is pretty ordinary, but the overall picture makes a good wallpaper.

Then there are those photos which would make good wallpapers if cropped. It's not as easy as it sounds. More often than not, one needs to recongnise that only a small part of the "bracket" is going to look good. That "bracket" is often hidden in the noise that surrounds it and wit a little bit of practise, one starts looking for it.

An example of the cropped kind follows:

I'm particularly proud of this one becuase it didn't need much cropping. Let me give you a hint... "just the corners". A free beer to any one who can guess what the object really was. By the way, I call it "The Crevice".

P.S. hese photos aren't wallpaper quality. If you want 1600x1200 images, either post a comment (for those who know me), post a comment with your email address (I won't spam you, I promise).

Like father like son

2006-02-24T02:59:00.000+05:30

I can't believe it. After all that there is for the sake of difference, I and Hobbes are a lot similar. We both like to lounge around, we prefer to rest rather than work, we regard sleeping as one of the way that we are contributing to the world's betterment, and we both love Tum.

And if we were normal human beings, there would have been some jealosy and resentment between us. But luckily, Hobbes is a cat. And I don't mean just any cat. Hobbes is one of those feline creatures that have perfected the art of living without earning anything more than love.

He's a cute creature. And arousing "aaawwwww" feelings is in his nature. I wonder what it takes. No one ever said "aaawwwwww" to me the same way that they say it to Hobbes. Maybe I need to grow some fur.

But jokes apart, there are certain attributes that he does have that really endear him to anyone. The way he says "meeeeeeeaow" in this high alto voice that he specially reserves for his begging. I wish I could "meeeeeeaow" my way through my appraisals... if it worked it would have a double meaning, wouldn't it? Not only am I not hungry, but so is my cat :D.

And I really don't want to mention how caring he is. When he was really young (less than 6" long), he and Tequila used to sleep around their Mom. In the middle of the night, Tequila would get it into her head that she wants to bother Mommy. So she'd start biting her. Hobbesey to the rescue. Despite being tiny, the little runt would go and plop himself on top of her, and refuse to let go until Mommy finally woke up and acknowledged her debt to him ;).

Bole to ekdum apne baap pe gaya hai ;).

Cycling in Nagpur

2006-02-23T01:33:00.000+05:30

Quite a few of my readers know that I've studied engineering in Nagpur for two years before I was forced to quit due to eligibility problems and ended up doing my graduation and post-graduation in Pune.

Well, I was a different type of person when I was in Nagpur. I used to study for one ;). Another of my traits was cycling. For two years I rode my bicycle of Japanese origins a lot. I would peg it at around 15-20 kms a day on average.

It was a beauty of a bicycle, if I may say so myself. I'd bought it in Colombo when Dad was posted there, and it was one of those all-terrain things. With a light MgAl frame (the same stuff that's used in making airplanes), I could lift it from the hub with no effort at all.

I used to ride pretty fast. I remember once, when I was cruising down a road, pumping my legs hard as usual, I'd chanced to look at a motorcycle's speedo while passing it. It showed 40kph. :) Still brings a smile to my face. I remember his face as well... no smile there :D.

Once when I was visiting my classmates on the other side of town (hell I don't remember the names of places anymore, its so long ago), I'd bragged to my sardar friend (Harpal) that I could race him to the south-indian fast food joint around a km away, and would beat him. The bet was on. I'd been slightly lucky. The traffic was a bit heavy, and I had access to the footpaths that he couldn't get onto :). I got a free milkshake.

I'd had a couple of accidents on it. Nothing serious (serious means broken bones). I'd a habit of always skidding to a stop. It used to work like this. My front brake calipers were slightly loose. So when I used to apply the front brake even slightly, it used to cause the calipers to go inside the fork so that the front wheel used to lock. This used to cause the rear wheel to go light. If I hit the rear brakes at that instant, the result used to be a beautiful skidding stop.

My tyres always wore out pretty fast. One other time I'd claimed to the aforementioned Harpal and his roomie Sanyam that I could do a 360 degree skid. As chance would have it, a patch of loose sand on a smooth road happened at the right time, and I managed to perform the only 360 degree skid in my life :). More milkshake :D.

Nice memories actually. I left the cycle back in Nagpur along with some other of my stuff, intending to go back and pick it up a couple of weeks later. Never went :(. I don't even have any photos of those days, only memories. But as I said, nice memories actually :).

Look Ma, extra heads!

2006-02-23T01:18:00.000+05:30

A colleague in office (Navneet, methinks), responded to my fire writing post with an idea of his own. The result is here for you to see. The trick is to set the camera steady on a 8sec exposure in a dark room and use a flashlight to light up your face in different locations. Cool no?

The cartoons of yesteryears

2006-02-22T01:42:00.000+05:30

I have a recurring dream. There's a hole in the ground from which animated bugs are coming out. I can't see what kind of bugs they are. But they are of different shapes, colours and sizes. They all seem to be in a trance. All except one, who is helplessly shouting away to glory at all the others, telling them not to do it. And they all take to the sky... one after the other soaring towards the sun. Just to fall back dead.

I have this dream once in a while actually. When I say recurring, I mean once every 3 or 4 months. But it is there for the remembering. I saw it the first time after watching it in a cartoon. And the scene stuck. The cartoon was one of those Japanese variety dubbed in Arabic, so I don't even know the words. Just the images. Must've seen it when I was around 6 I think.

Another cartoon I remember is the Thundercats, about whom I've blogged at length already, so I won't bore you with them.

Then there's Tom & Jerry. Absolutely the best comedy pair ever. I know their cartoons down to each scene. Touche Mr. Pussycat :).

And there's Bugs Bunny. I really like him. And I hate Mickey. Wiley Coyote. Elmer Fudd. What a set!!!

And last but not the least, my video cassette of Pink Panther cartoons, that my Mom and Dad recorded the movie Masoom over. I hated the movie for 4 years, and watched it 25 times before I finally understood it. Then I didn't hate it as much, but I'd still love to have those Pink Panther cartoons back.

Dead ant, Dead ant :p.