Life does like to throw googlies at you. I wish I had a pact with God like the one that Joey (of the Friends fame) had, where I'd never turn 30. I wish I'd keep on oscillating: 27-28-29-28-27-28....
Life differed with me. I'm quite sure that I'll be 30 next year instead of 28 :(.
But being 30 brings along with it a new horizon. Call it a question of sour grapes, but for all the good things that have happened to me in my 20s, there has been a bug infestation of the juvenile kind has been my constant companion for the last 10 years.
There has been that independent and rebellious (read lazy) streak in me that has prevented me from showing my potential. All things said and done, this one aspect of my personality has been my greatest enemy. Basically, if I'd been hardworking, I'd have been a much richer man.
But maybe not happier. Apurv mentioned to Tum the other day that while I was sitting in office proclaiming to learn about web technologies, I was actually watching a move (I plead guilty - Aeonflux, don't watch it). At other times my various colleagues would have caught me at playing games, catching up with different blogs, reading funny news from around the world, and chatting up with many of my capital former colleagues.
The intention isn't there. I'd much rather be an industrious worker and finish off my stuff before it is ever asked for. I'd like to be a Subho or a Santosh (and I really admire them for their brand of faithfulness, neither of them read my blog, I think), but I'm sadly built without that particular switch that'd make me both fun-loving and hard-working at the same time.
But I don't mind. I work great under pressure. And that brings me to my point of contention (there is a french sounding phrase for that, but I can't remember it for the life of me). I am getting old :(, and I probably won't be as good under pressure as I used to be. Then what do I do?
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